[ to be kicked when you're down to feel like you've been pushed around ]

you might think i'm happy ; Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Personal issues....

Track: Complicated... (Avril Lavigne)
Time: 2002hrs...
Status: A bit dazed, gonna eat dinner soon.... Maybe...
Feelings: Slightly stressed, exhausted... Lonely?...
Quote: A true friend is one who will only get in your way when you're falling...

Well... Dad going for his treatment soon... HOnestly, I'm feeling kinda scared... Can just leave it all to Him... All in his hands... I remembered... My dad did mention... "If He takes me back, I'll leave you all in his hands..." It was sorta painful for me la... Something like a "last resort" wish... As though it's inevitably over... This fight is over... Cancer... The same thing that took my grandma 2 years back... Might be the same thing to remove my dad from my life... Haiz... This is the only place I can safely blog out my feelings... So concealed only the closest souls will know about this torment...

Will it tear up my life?... Tear me up inside?... Tear me down after how far I've come?... Tear me away from reality?... Tear me into depression?... So many questions... So little answers... Well... Another issue...

Yesterday, had chats... Both stressful yet eye-openers to me... Issues relating to boy-girl relationships... First was someone... Who felt tied down because of his relationship... He cares a lot for her (his gf) but then, somehow... He prefers them to be at a level which is close, but no emotions involved... That was difficult... Hope he's doing okie with it... (Reminds me of my friendship with Isna... :D A true friend worthwhile)... Another one... A chat with one of my new friends... Learnt that, something that is good, might not be totally good... Take honesty for example... Honest feelings... Sounds good right?... Yah, but then... If your boyfriend/girlfriend is honest to you that he/she likes another person and thinks you're not compatible, wouldn't that hurt?... On the other hand, what about living in a relationship that is a complete lie?... Which one would hurt more?... Though both will eventually hurt... Lotsa stuff at the back of my mind... But well... More important stuff to think of... So, I'll end here... Thanks to those close friends who drop by here to read this... Shall keep you updated on how my dad's doing...

but i'm not going to be ok ; 8:38 PM

welcome to my life [simple plan] Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place?
Like somehow you just don't belong
And no one understands you

Do you ever wanna run away?
Do you lock yourself in your room?
With the radio on turned up so loud
That no one hears you screaming

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels alright
You don't know what it's like to be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked
When you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like

Welcome to my life

Do you wanna be somebody else?
Are you sick of feeling so left out?
Are you desperate to find something more
Before your life is over

Are you stuck inside a world you hate?
Are you sick of everyone around?
With the big fake smiles and stupid lies
While deep inside you're bleeding

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels alright
You don't know what it's like to be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked
When you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like

Welcome to my life

No one ever lied straight to your face
And no one ever stabbed you in the back
You might think I'm happy
But I'm not gonna be ok

Everybody always gave you what you wanted
You never had to work it was always there
You don't know what it's like
What it's like

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked
When you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like (what it's like)

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked
When you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like

Welcome to my life

Welcome to my life

Welcome to my life

[profile]

*Muhammad Khalis*
*16+*
*Pioneer JC*
*Right-Handed*
*28101988*
*Male*

[craves]

*A realisation for life*
*Good grades in 2005*
*Be strong and true*
*Be more patient*
*Loyal friends*
*Someone there*

[wishlist]

*Nokia 7270*
*An MP3 Player
*A Purpose in Life*
*Someone there*
*PS 2*
*Gd Grades in 2005*

[links]

Isna
My Public Side
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